Final year projects and industrial training. Never in my wildest dream I would have thought that they will be so difficult, and it haven't even begin yet. I think I am afraid of it, how everything its going to turn out. I don't even understand this recurring fear myself.

I think probably the fact that me being a screwed up student, its going to rear its ugly head now. I've always thought that I could get by this way, that its all OK, but I guess now that illusion is slowly being shattered. Its really not fun to be someone who's constantly complaining about my cgpa putting me on a back foot in practically everything, but I don't know if ignoring it will fix anything. I don't pretend to be who I'm not and who I am, is really screwed up right now.

Well, a little too late now huh for me to wake up to this reality. I really wish I was a better person in every way. Its not just about my academic, its about everything. Me, as a complete person. I don't know what the problem is anymore. Well, maybe I do, I just...

And like it or not, I guess my final year in uni is finally approaching. And I know everyone's going to go far, do great things with their life. They all will. Except for me of course. Destined to take the rough road no matter where...

Well, that's a lot of pessimism there, but I guess it makes the disappointment more tolerable. I guess that's why...