23
Well, here I am, one year older, but never really got that far in terms of maturity.
It's been a really strange year for me, many mistakes were made, all of which I wished I could take them back, but, I guess while I've never had any intentions to have how the way everything went down, sometimes the reason why I did what I did, all the times I've tried, all the times I acted on my insecurities, and whatever stupid things I've did, I just didn't want to live not knowing what it would have been.
There are many times I wish I could turn back time, to when it all begin and perhaps I could have did what I never do, and things would have been different, but I guess that's all the things that I'll never know.
Ultimately, to sum it all up, there was no manual or guidebook for being 22 or 21. No one is handing out road maps for the road less traveled, I just have to get on and drive without any directions. The word normal doesn't applies to me or my life, and that's that. I just have to steer to wherever my guts tells me to, and I'm going to make mistakes after mistakes over and over again.
This is silly, but I felt the need to pen this down here, that to everyone out there in the world who's having their birthday on this day, I would like to wish them all a very happy birthday and tell them that it's going to be ok. Even though if it doesn't goes the way you expected it to be, certain things that you wish or hope had took place but it never does, its ok. Because we all tend to hope for something more than what we could get. And its ok to be disappointed, that's what makes us real. But at the end, we'll only remember the fond ones and that disappointment will be buried in time.
In the mean time, know that you are not the only one going through this. Someone out there is going through the same thing too, and I guess the thought of that somehow makes it a little more bearable
As what I've just learned from an online message board run by Yahoo.
It's been a really strange year for me, many mistakes were made, all of which I wished I could take them back, but, I guess while I've never had any intentions to have how the way everything went down, sometimes the reason why I did what I did, all the times I've tried, all the times I acted on my insecurities, and whatever stupid things I've did, I just didn't want to live not knowing what it would have been.
There are many times I wish I could turn back time, to when it all begin and perhaps I could have did what I never do, and things would have been different, but I guess that's all the things that I'll never know.
Ultimately, to sum it all up, there was no manual or guidebook for being 22 or 21. No one is handing out road maps for the road less traveled, I just have to get on and drive without any directions. The word normal doesn't applies to me or my life, and that's that. I just have to steer to wherever my guts tells me to, and I'm going to make mistakes after mistakes over and over again.
This is silly, but I felt the need to pen this down here, that to everyone out there in the world who's having their birthday on this day, I would like to wish them all a very happy birthday and tell them that it's going to be ok. Even though if it doesn't goes the way you expected it to be, certain things that you wish or hope had took place but it never does, its ok. Because we all tend to hope for something more than what we could get. And its ok to be disappointed, that's what makes us real. But at the end, we'll only remember the fond ones and that disappointment will be buried in time.
In the mean time, know that you are not the only one going through this. Someone out there is going through the same thing too, and I guess the thought of that somehow makes it a little more bearable
As what I've just learned from an online message board run by Yahoo.
posted by Garry at 11:45 PM
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