Sunday, January 25, 2009

Update Thus Far

Rotten Luck
Score a huge scar on my head, good thing the bleeding could be stopped without much pain. Well, everytime I think my luck couldn't be any worse, I'm proven wrong. I just wished it wasn't so pain.

Hello and Goodbye
Finally finished my industrial training. It was weird though, for the first time being around people who are not my peers, but rather, people who are much older, who knows so much more than I do. But I could almost swear some of them were nice people I never thought I'd meet there. Though the same can't be said about the managers. I wonder how they manage to avoid any thyroid condition with all the shouting they do.

It sure went by fast. One moment I was walking through an endless corridor lost among a facility fulled of people, and now I said goodbye to that place, having watching how the place shrunk. It was quite a deserted place on my last day there. I wonder how they are now, if the Lite On contract went through.

Shame I was the only trainee there. But I guess not all of us are lucky enough.

Anyway I guess I owe a huge part of it to LF. Being able to talk to her make it feels like I'm not alone in all of this after all. I've always wanted to talk to her anyway, even though its just through online, and admittedly, I must have been a idiotic bugger sometimes. Heh.

Can't say for sure where did I went wrong, but thats what I feel its like. I am that much of an annoyance. I still wonder where did I go wrong all the time, though I probably am beginning to understand why I always ended up pushing everyone away and make them doesn't want to talk to me...

Coda
As the people I know are all nearing the end of their studies, or already have, there are many that I will probably not see them again. Well, not that I still keep in contact with most of them, but for those that I do, I a way, I felt kind of sad about it. These people may not know it, but these few that I've had the pleasure of knowing, they've all leave a huge impact in my life, more than they will ever know.

Sometimes I wish I could tell them, but realizing how awkward it will turn out, I guess I don't need to make them realize how much more of a freak I am than what they already knew.

...............

That's all about it, my lame and unevenful past few weeks.

CNY's coming up. I'm still very lonely here. Still wondering where did I go wrong, and how could I fix myself if I don't even know where I went wrong. There are people I always wants to talk to, but I guess I don't deserve that.

The only thing I deserve is to be this dork from the wrong end of the social spectrum who plays video game or watches Stargate every other night.

Next week, my cousins will probably ask me the same thing again when I see them.

Easiest questions is do I have a girlfriend already? Well, its not hard at all to tell them that I'm still single, and I don't even mind if anyone wants to laugh at that. I wonder why though they are all so curious. Either its because of my age or they think I'm gay, heh.

But the hardest questions is, "Didn't go out with friends?"

How do we explain to people that we don't have any friends that we can hang out with?

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